China's most henpecked husbands

Updated: 2014-08-21 11:16

By Xu Lin(chinadaily.com.cn)

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In Sichuan province and Chongqing, the henpecked culture is so deep-rooted that there is a special term, "soft ears", in the dialects referring to such husbands. Wives often tweak the ears of their husbands when they quarrel.

In a survey of more than 1,500 Chongqing netizens by Tencent.com, over 75 percent said they do not care about being called "soft ears" and are afraid of their wives.

About 54 percent said being afraid of their wives has both pros and cons, while 40 percent said it is good.

"I think if you indulge your wife, you are 'soft ears'. Many men I know are like that," says Pan Feng, 34, from Chongqing, who lived in Chengdu for 10 years.

Most Chinese men like to save face and want their wives to be obedient if there are others present.

However, Pan says if a wife in Chengdu disagrees with something, the husband will not argue against her even if they are in public.

"Being afraid shows that men respect and care for their wives," said Ming Li, Deputy Director of the China Marriage and Family Counseling Center. "It's actually a kind of wisdom."

She said henpecked husbands have more say on major family issues, though they listen to their wives on less important matters.

"I refer to those who are refined and considerate and don't quarrel with their wives even when there are conflicts," she added.

"The more civilized a city is, the more henpecked husbands there are. Henpecked husbands are often modest, and the divorce rate is low."

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