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Keanu Reeves says he's lonely and wants to get married and have children, in an upcoming issue of Parade magazine. The 41-year-old actor says he continues to mourn the loss of his stillborn daughter in 1999 and the death of the baby's mother, Jennifer Syme, in a car crash in 2001.
Syme had a small part in the 1997 David Lynch film, "Lost Highway." She and Reeves had reportedly broken up in 2000.
"When the people you love are gone, you're alone," he tells the magazine. "I miss being a part of their lives and them being a part of mine. I wonder what the present would be like if they were here - what we might have done together. I miss all the great things that will never be."
He adds: "It's not fair! It's absurd."
"I'm trying not to be alone so much," Reeves says. "And man, it's a struggle. I want to get married. I want to have kids. That's at the top of the mountain. I've got to climb the mountain first. I'll do it. Just give me some time."
But Reeves, who stars with Sandra Bullock in "The Lake House," which opens June 16, and the animated thriller "A Scanner Darkly," set for release next month, says he's reached a "turning point" in his personal life.
"I think, after loss, life requires an act of reclaiming," he says. "You have to reject being overwhelmed. Life has to go on."
He has bought his first home, a step in a new "makeover" to establish roots in one location. In childhood, he watched his mother, Patricia, move the family many times and adopted that way of life.
"I've had a vagabond life," he says. "There is a bit of the gypsy in me, and living that way seemed to make sense. I couldn't settle down. ... Then I turned 40. That birthday is hard, perhaps because you know you're grown-up."
Reeves also starred in "The Matrix" movies.