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The art of remembering lives

A tombstone designer creates customized memorial spaces, helping families stay connected to loved ones through personal stories, Zhou Lihua and Hu Qing report.

By ZHOU LIHUA and HU QING | China Daily | Updated: 2026-05-05 14:26

Xu discusses a tombstone design plan with a colleague.[Photo provided to China Daily]

Xu says he avoids the traditional use of plain black stone, instead creating what he describes as a "small courtyard". Evergreen plants provide structure, flowers bloom in spring, and even in winter there is some greenery, ensuring the space never feels desolate.

He often leaves intentional blank spaces on the stone, inviting families to return each year and add their own inscriptions or elements. He also visits regularly to check conditions and maintain the sites.

Xu follows a principle passed down from his parents. "If you deceive the living, you may still have a chance to make amends. But if you deceive the dead, you never will," he says.

One project continues to stay with him. A young woman once described her father, a serviceman stationed on a remote island. Her clearest memory was of arriving each year to find him waiting at the dock, the sea stretching behind him under a vast sky.

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