笑话_休闲英语_中国日报网英语点津

Humor Joke 幽默笑话

中国日报网英语点津为您精选语言地道的英语笑话，开心学英语。

讨厌的邻居

2010-04-30 09:21
"My neighbor is very disgusting, who moved here recently, he rang the bell of my house with a rush late at night."

谈条件

2010-04-29 10:24
My wife, who's a hair stylist, said, "If you let us off with a warning, I'll give you a free haircut for a year."

苹果统治世界

2010-04-28 10:22
Look at all those people fighting, robbing, rioting--no one seems willing to get along with his fellow man. Some day we apples will be the only ones left. Then we'll rule the world.

和企鹅结婚

2010-04-27 09:33
"I want to find a cute partner, who also likes aquatic sports and group activities."

新鲜的咖啡

2010-04-26 10:24
"I'm sure it is," answered the waitress. "We've only been open two weeks."

你最好不要学

2010-04-23 10:29
The dog had its leg hiked up and was licking itself. One of the old men said to the other, "I sure do wish I could do that."

爸爸掉进井里了

2010-04-22 10:21
The class assignment in composition was to write about something unusual that happened during the past week.

肚里的宝宝

2010-04-21 10:21
A three-year-old walked over to a pregnant lady while waiting with his mother in the doctors office.

超市跟踪

2010-04-20 10:39
As I moved to each aisle, there he was, smiling at me. Now I was wondering if he was interested in me.

熨斗电话

2010-04-19 09:48
Jack with two burnt ears went to the doctor, who asked what had happened.

我记下了车牌号

2010-04-16 09:58
Five minutes later, she came running up to him yelling, "Oscar! Oscar! I just saw someone driving off with your new Mercedes!"

多亏了刹车

2010-04-15 09:19
"Sure was," replied the second. "And if I hadn't kept the brake on, we would have slid down backward."

把他叫醒

2010-04-14 09:25
The teacher shouts to the sleeping student's neighbor, "Hey, wake that student up!"

给小费的理由

2010-04-13 09:04
"When I get bad cards, it's not the dealer's fault. And, when I get good cards, the dealer obviously has nothing to do with it. So, why should I tip him?"

给胳膊判刑

2010-04-12 09:22
"Well put," the judge replied. "Using your logic, I sentence the defendant's arm to one year's imprisonment. He can accompany it or not, as he chooses."

嚎叫的病人

2010-04-09 09:59
Dentist: Please stop howling. I haven't even touched your tooth yet.

酒精的好处

2010-04-08 10:38
In order to prove the harmful effect of alcohol, the teacher put a bug into a glass filled with alcohol, soon the bug died.

为什么看我

2010-04-07 09:53
Guest: "Why does your dog sit there and watch me eat?"

为什么这么快

2010-04-06 10:21
"How could you have gone all the way around the church, throw up and be back here so soon?"

和上帝通电话

2010-04-02 09:36
"Well, talking to God is like talking on the telephone. He's on the other end, but you can't see him. He is listening though."

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