笑话_休闲英语_中国日报网英语点津

Humor Joke 幽默笑话

中国日报网英语点津为您精选语言地道的英语笑话，开心学英语。

中彩票

2010-02-01 10:16
A man gets home, screeches his car into the driveway, runs into the house, slams the door and shouts at the top of his lungs, "Honey, pack your bags. I won the damn lottery!"

药方

2010-01-29 08:57
He looks at the photo and says... "Oh I didn't know you had a prescription!"

谁的手机

2010-01-28 10:04
When a cell phone on a bench rings, a man engages the hands-free speaker function and begins to talk...

十美元

2010-01-27 10:02
"Well," Fred replied, "I was going to say something when Ethel fell out, but ten dollars is ten dollars."

100头骆驼

2010-01-26 10:14
Morris replied, "I was trying to figure out how to get 100 camels back home."

下场

2010-01-25 10:02
The man replied, "That's OK. I just want her to see what a man looks like who's given up drinking, gambling, and golf."

偷衣服

2010-01-22 09:52
"Yes, Your Honor," sighed the suspect, "but the first three times my wife didn't like the color!"

死期

2010-01-21 09:09
Now my grandfather, he knew the exact day of the year that he was going to die. It was the right year too.

开罚单

2010-01-20 09:44
Astounded that he alone was caught, he asked, "Out of all these trucks that were going just as fast as I was, why did you pull me over?"

结婚仪式

2010-01-19 09:27
When he asked whether they preferred a contemporary or a traditional service, they opted for the contemporary.

拼错名字

2010-01-18 10:34
Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.

这里很热

2010-01-15 09:12
To My Loving Wife: I've just been checked in. Everything has been prepared for your arrival here tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then.

结婚纪念礼物

2010-01-14 10:03
With their 30th wedding anniversary approaching, Ron asks his wife, Sylvia, what she wants to celebrate the occasion.

六个孩子的妈

2010-01-13 09:33
His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion shouts right back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four."

寄钱

2010-01-12 09:31
A student had spent all his money, so he called his mother from college and asked if she could send him some.

爱你的丈夫

2010-01-11 10:43
He said, "Your husband is suffering from a very severe disease, combined with horrible stress. If you don't do the following, your husband will surely die."

老婆生气的后果

2010-01-08 09:44
Finally his wife stopped the nagging and simply said to him, "How would you like it if you didn't see me for two or three days?"

我什么都愿意做

2010-01-07 09:56
A student comes to a young professor's office. She glances down the hall, closes his door, kneels pleadingly.

书虫

2010-01-06 09:45
"Hmmmm," Chris mumbled, "that's not such a bad idea. Then I could take you to the library every few days and change you for something more interesting."

死前的一天

2010-01-05 09:02
"The day before I die, I'd like to sell every piece we've got just to see how much it's all worth."

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