2007-06-28 09:42
Gravely ill, a man went to the doctor with his wife. After the examination the physician motioned for the wife to meet him in the hallway.
2007-06-27 08:56
Four friends were arguing over whose dog was the smartest. The first man, an engineer, called to his dog, "T Square, show your stuff." The dog trotted over to a desk, pulled out a paper and pencil, and drew a perfect triangle.
2007-06-26 08:40
A drill sergeant ordered two young female recruits to paint a room in the barracks, stressing that they do not get any paint on their uniforms.
2007-06-25 08:32
A famous scientist was on his way to yet another lecture when his chauffeur offered an idea. "Hey, boss, I've heard your speech so many times, I bet I could deliver it and give you the night off."
2007-06-22 08:45
My 16-year-old son, Jeff, is a boy any parent would be proud of-until you see the floor of his room, covered with layers of clothes, magazines and sports equipment.
2007-08-18 08:00
Goethe was once strolling on a narrow path in Weimar. As luck would have it, he met with a critic who was hostile to him. Both of them stopped, staring at each other. Then the critic said: “I will never make way for a fool.”
“But I will.” With that Goethe retreated aside.
2007-06-15 08:00
A smart society woman was sitting next to President Coolidge at a party. “ Oh, Mr President,” she said smilingly, “you are so silent. I made a bet today that I could get more than two words out of you.”“ You lose.” The President said.
2007-06-14 08:00
Puccini, the composer of the Opera Madame Butterfly often sent a cake to his director Toscanini at Christmas. One year, he did so as usual, but he suddenly remembered he had had words with that famous director. He was very sorry for it. He was afraid that Toscanini might return it. So he sent a telegram: "Sorry. Cake sent by mistake. Puccini." Soon he received a reply: "Sorry. Cake eaten by mistake. Toscanini."
2007-06-13 08:28
Once Bernard Shaw was having a walk when some harum-scarum cyclist ran into him and Shaw fell to the ground. The cyclist was very sorry and came off his bike to help Shaw get on his feet. Fortunately Shaw was not hurt. The cyclist apologized to Shaw, but Shaw said, "I’m sorry that you are unlucky. If you had killed me, you would be known all over the world."
2007-06-11 08:00
A man was walking in the street when he heard a voice: "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you."
2007-06-07 08:00
A mathematician, an accountant and an economist apply for the same job. The interviewer calls in the mathematician and asks, "What does two plus two equal?"
2007-06-06 08:00
Three guys are drinking in a bar when a drunk comes in, staggers up to them, and points at the guy in the middle, shouting, "Your mom’s the best lay in town!"